Well, I prefer to have people who are interested in what I have to say follow me anyway
Is what I have to say really that repulsive?
I’m on Facebook right now and a girl I went to Jr. High with posted a status saying that she went through her man’s phone and basically that she’s “shaking her head at her man and these hoes.” Now the first few responses were things like “What do you expect?” “What you don’t know won’t hurt you” etc…
Well she obviously expected something that she didn’t want to see, but did want to know, or else she wouldn’t have gone through his phone. One guy even responded by saying:
“Females like u need to stop going thur dudes phones… Think bout it wat ever u don’t noe won’t hurt u. I’m not sayin this to get u mad but to help u so u won’t get hurt seein something that u don’t wanna c.”
First of all “Females like u.” To me this means insecure females who go through their insecure boyfriend’s cellphones. And he’s saying this to help her? Helping her would be telling her to buck up and be with someone who’s ready for a healthy relationship! The next few people to comment agreed with this person, but I had to respond by saying it’s sad that this is to be expected from our partner.
I feel that a lot of relationships start because Subject A feels a sense of ownership over Subject B, that person belongs to them now and they’re not expected to go astray. Subject A feels that they are the dominate person in the relationship, therefore they can do whatever they want either behind Subject B’s back or right in their face without consequence. Now, just to be clear, I’m not trying to say every relationship is like that, just the majority haha. Relationships are not about ownership, they are about partnership. In a secure relationship there is no need to look through each others’ phone or e-mail because we know they have nothing to hide, or rather, we believe they have nothing to hide (we never really know).
A couple months ago my boyfriend admitted to me that in the beginning of our relationship every single time I left the room that he would look through my phone. When he told me, I wasn’t angry and I wasn’t angry because I never had anything to hide. I gave him my password whenever I changed it, not so that he could go through my messages, but in case he needed to use my phone or something. I never felt the need to go through his phone because I wasn’t doing anything myself that I felt I needed to hide. In my mind, if I wasn’t hiding anything, neither was he. I suppose if he was looking through my phone at the time that it was very possible that he had things he was hiding from me, and maybe he was looking through my phone to try to justify whatever it was that he was hiding, but honestly I could really never know, nor do I care because that was the beginning of our relationship. Trust must be earned, especially by people with baggage.
This morning I found out that if things stay the way they are right now that I will only be able to see my partner once a month for the next two years. At first I got really upset, but then I told myself that this is the life that I chose and that once a month I’m just going to have to have a stressful day in order to ultimately get what I want in the end. Sometimes I can deal with the stress of my long distance relationship, but on days like this I feel like I’m going to throw up and than my head will explode. We haven’t been able to speak since Thursday, but it feels like we haven’t spoken since last month; it’s strange what a toll not speaking to each other can take on the both of us. I can only imagine how he’s feeling right now, hopefully he’s keeping it together better than I am. I just find it difficult to find distractions from my stress because I get into this rut of despair and fatigue, which obviously makes it hard to do anything. I’m planning on not only cleaning, but cleaning out my room today (i.e getting rid of shit I haven’t touched in ages). Hopefully a clear bedroom will equal to a clear state of mind.
Even though I’m not completely sane myself..
Last night at work I was talking to this older couple at the bar and the wife was talking about how every time she drinks that she wants to go get a tattoo, but she wasn’t sure where on her body she wanted one or what she really wanted in general. I could relate because I’ve been wanting a new tattoo lately, something that has to do with my passion for hospitality and bartending, but I’m not sure of what I want or where I want to put it once I decide on what I’m going to get. I was thinking about a vintage strainer or a bottle of my favorite bourbon, but I don’t really like the idea of having a bottle of Maker’s Mark tattooed on my body and strainers aren’t the most attractive objects out there. Cocktail glasses are cliche, blah. I just have to find the right artist to work with I suppose.
Take xanax
Shop
Smoke
Eat Asian cuisine that’s bad for me
Liz at Cosi.
